Toddlers are just like teenagers, but without the hormones.
Isabel is learning to use a spoon, but insists on scooping up her food and then upending the spoon to get the contents into her mouth. Of course, the spoon fits better when it is upside down because it conforms to the tongue, but the food gets everywhere. I try to show her the correct way, but she insists on her way. The trouble is, she gives me this really smug 13-year-old look when she scoops food in upside down, as if to say: "see, I know the RIGHT way to do this." All the while, I am holding the bowl under her mouth to catch the food she spills.
I have this clear vision into the future (when she is a teen) of the same look on her face as she "proves" that she is right again about something. I realize that my role as her mother is to empower her ability to control her life, all while holding the bowl under her mouth to catch her food. I hope I can always be there to help her learn and figure out her messes.
I took the photo as she was scooping upside down, but as soon as she saw the camera, she started crying for it. When I put it away, she recommenced eating. Such a toddler!
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If my writing is illegible in any way, it is because I have had over 1/2 bottle of wine, which is a lot for me. I am so sad that I finally sold my bike, Daisy, today. I sold it to a very nice couple from Mill Valley, and she will be ridden, but I miss her so much. She reminds me of what I miss most about NYC - my commute along the Hudson River Parkway. One of the most beautiful commutes in the world. I know Northern CA is very beautiful, but you do not have the architecture mixed with nature on your bike paths. I'm feeling very sad for my lost time alone on a bike that I love. So, I am listening to the songs I used to listen to on my daily rides and feeling very lonely for that bit of myself that got lost when I became a mother. Songs like this on the stereo now ... "Barracuda" ... how can a mother listen to that like a single woman would? With a little bit of jealousy of that single woman, that's how. Oh, if I could only live my 20's and early 30's over again!
I can't believe I had to sell my bike - I feel like I sold myself.
My mom and a friend drove Isabel and I to see an apartment for rent in Sausalito yesterday. The price people can charge for what is so unappealing. A bedroom without a window? Is that even legal (not in NYC). Very depressing housing situation.
We drove on to San Anselmo where my very dear friend, Lauri Luck, had an artist reception of some of her dog paintings. It was so great to see her and her family - her sister and mum came up from LA to see the show. Isabel has a huge crush on Lauri's twin boys, so everyone had a fun reason for the trip.
When I first met Lauri on Potrero Hill in SF many many years ago, she was drawing dogs with pastels. Life came along and she drifted in and out of her creative life. There was marriage, work, raising two little boys on a sailboat. She always strives to reconnect with her art and, it seems, always in a new way (first pastels and now painting). She is an inspiration to me that the process of creating can be much more important that the final product. She is a real artist - someone who cannot live without her art. I am privileged to call her my friend and have her be so supportive of my creative life.
Yesterday was my first show – Appel and Frank in Mill Valley. It was quite an experience! Two weeks of no sleep and non-stop sewing with my mom at the iron when she wasn’t running after Isabel. Hubby making beautiful marketing brochures and signage. All of us so exhausted.
The sale itself was not very good for any of the vendors and I have to guess that it was due to the economy. The first 300 attendees were given gift bags, but there were still over 50 bags when we packed up. We were told there would be 700-800 people there, customers and shop owners. That was the down side.
On the upside were all the great people we met. Our neighbor at the show, Piper, is the owner of Retro Youth Designs who designs super cute denim jackets with funking lining and details. We picked Rodeo for Isabel. She traded me the jacket for a pinafore because we both wanted to shop, yet be frugal. I'm so glad Piper was my neighbor because she was really sweet and it was her first show as well, so I didn't feel like a complete newby.
I think our table looked really clean and professional, and we received very positive feedback. I'm just going to have to work harder on the marketing end. I have an upcoming post about a new development in the works.
Overall, it was a really good experience and I'm looking forward to the next two upcoming shows.